Stick a fork to Meghan and Harry - it's over

Stick a fork to Meghan and Harry – it’s over

Every time I think Prince Harry couldn’t seem more trustworthy, he appears to prove me spectacularly and terribly wrong.

The renegade royal’s final howl is a hilarious tourist advert he made for New Zealand TV to promote his sustainable eco-travel nonprofit, Travalyst.

Unfortunately, the laughter was once again towards him, not with him.

Wearing a ‘Girl Dad’ t-shirt, Harry is seen jogging in the woods before being stopped by ecotourism ‘rating officers’ and reprimanded about a lollipop wrapper he allegedly dropped during a royal trip in 2018 with his wife Meghan, but was praised for turning off the tap water while he brushed his teeth.

This revelation prompted a puzzled Harry to exclaim, “How do you know that? It’s really weird.

Because of course he’s such a private guy and it’s secret personal information that could only be known if he had turned into the Kardashian with 24/7 cameras recording his every ablution and teeth cleanings.

Oh wait, he has!

Harry and Meghan have become the royal Kardashians, only a slightly trashier version if that were even possible: a brazen lucky pair whose only thought each day is how to steal and exploit their increasingly cynically royal titles, while while simultaneously trashing the royal family and monarchy to which they owe their status – and playing downtrodden, downtrodden victims of their $11 million California mansion.

The hypocrisy in everything they do is breathtaking, and never better exemplified than by Harry’s latest sermon on ‘sustainable eco travel’.

He loves to bark smugly at us about the urgent need to save the planet by reducing our carbon footprint because he uses private jets like we use taxis.

Just like he and Meghan begged us to think about poverty on Twitter the very day she was having a $500,000 baby shower in New York (and flying back to London on George Clooney’s plane).

But it’s their constant bleating about privacy that most sticks in their throats given their decision to accept a $115 million payment from Netflix to follow them with cameras, capturing their most cherished moments. “private” for public enjoyment.

Meghan Markle and Prince Harry.
Meghan Markle and Prince Harry watch sitting volleyball on day two of the Invictus Games in The Hague in April 2022.
James Whatling/MEGA

Ironically, this decision came back to bite them on their privileged butts.

At first, it all made sense when the world’s most awake Virtue Signaling couple joined the world’s most awake Virtue Signaling streaming giant after a fierce bidding war for their “empowering and inspiring” services. .

Harry and Meghan seemed to have found their perfect partners, a company that around the same time proudly greenlit an entire comedy series about a pregnant man (it had to be a man, because otherwise Netflix would have felt compelled to call a pregnant woman a “birthing and nursing partner”) and would revel in their very special brand of awake royal conferences.

PrinceHarry.
Prince Harry wears a “Girl Dad” shirt while promoting Travalyst.
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Only, like the false societal plague of awakening itself, it turned out there was nothing remotely empowering or inspiring about it.

Their company Archewell Productions’ first offering was an animated series, “Pearl,” about a young “heroine” girl who embarks “on a journey of self-discovery as she tries to overcome life’s daily challenges” and apparently based on Meghan’s own uplifting. trip (no laughing from the back, please).

The Duchess of Sussex was thrilled when she announced the project, gushing over her excitement to work on such an exciting series with “Netflix’s central platform”.

But that excitement turned to horror last week when Netflix suddenly unplugged it after reporting a dramatic and devastating drop in subscriber numbers.

It’s hard to believe that people would want to leave a platform that was poised to give them such empowering, inspiring and uplifting content, isn’t it?

PrinceHarry.
In the ad, Prince Harry is being chased by a group of ‘rating agents’.
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Well no. Not really.

The only real surprise is that Netflix ever thought we’d want to watch this kind of vomit-inducing guff from such absurd, judgmental, two-faced jerks.

After all, Meghan and Harry’s first and – to date – only podcast for their other big payers Spotify at the end of 2020 was so bad they haven’t done another since.

Although we’re promised a new series this summer, called ‘Archetypes’, in which Meghan will ‘talk to experts and origin historians about the stereotypes that hold women back’.

Sorry what?

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle.
Prince Harry and Meghan Markle visit the athletics event at the Invictus Games in The Hague on April 17, 2022.
Peter Dejong/AP

A woman who literally dug her greedy and ruthless claws into a British prince to enrich herself beyond her wildest dreams is going to tell us how horrible it is that women are held back in life?

It would be funny if it weren’t so pathetic.

So did his highly publicized children’s book, “The Bench,” about a father’s relationship with a son, which was a huge flop and was brutally trashed by critics.

Claire Allfree, writing for the UK’s Daily Telegraph, called her “semi-literate” and concluded: “One wonders how any editor could have thought it was good to publish this set of homilies from cod that rhyme badly, defying grammar, not to mention think any kid anywhere would want to read it. But this is planet Sussex for you, where even raising a family is a brand issue.

Exactly.

Like the Kardashians, there’s nothing these two won’t flog, no matter how personal, no depth of privacy invasion they won’t stoop to for financial gain.

But the world is quickly waking up to the cold, harsh reality that they have nothing worth saying unless they attack their families. And even that ugly shtick is running out.

In a final, perhaps terminal, blow to the Sussex brand, the Queen has just announced that she is banishing them both and the disgraced Prince Andrew from the balcony of Buckingham Palace during the parade ceremony. color at its upcoming platinum jubilee celebrations.

When even Her Majesty apparently feels her reputation would be tarnished simply by being seen with them in public, it’s over.

All in all, she’d probably prefer the Kardashians to wave to her.

At least they understand the meaning of family loyalty.

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